Can married couples serve as the pastors/directors of a ministry to single adults or young adults?

By Dennis Franck

  • Both married adults and single adults can serve as effective leaders in young adult and/or single adult ministry. In fact, in ministry to young adults some of the people attending will most likely be married. There are a few principles worth mentioning, however, that can serve as guidelines when considering married adults as either the pastor/director or as part of the leadership team.

    • Passion is needed - Leaders, whether married or single, must demonstrate a passion for the young adults or single adults they will be working with. Without a genuine interest and passion for them, effective ministry will not happen. People sense whether or not you really care! As an old saying goes, “People don’t care how much you know till they see how much you care.”
    • Young adult groups (basically people between 18-35 yrs old) are more accepting of married couples in leadership (especially in the 20’s and 30’s). Young adults who happen to be unmarried do not identify themselves by their marital status as easily and quickly as single adults who are late 30’s and older. Because of this, young single adults seem to relate well to young married adults of approximately the same age. Besides, unmarried young adults can learn many things from married adults concerning life issues that arise during marriage. Having married adults in the group gives models of marriage for them to observe.
    • Single Adult groups are more accepting of remarried couples in leadership (over age 35). Remarried adults understand the needs and issues of the single again person because they used to be single-again themselves. Remember, at least half of the people coming to a single adult group will be single again because of death of a marriage or death of a spouse. Single adults deserve to learn from remarried adults! After all, their today is remarried adults’ yesterday.
    • It is my belief that the leadership team should be primarily unmarried adults. If the team is dominated by married adults, the single adults, whether younger or older, may be hesitant to serve in leadership. Single adults should be the majority on the leadership team because of:
      • Life experiences
      • Flexibility of time
      • Understanding of single adult issues
      • Respect of peers
      • Example of life, growth and maturity
      • Identity of the ministry

The purpose of Assemblies of God Single Adult Ministries is to help districts, churches, pastors and leaders build spiritually-strong single and single-again adults of all ages.

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