V-Day

V-Day seems like an appropriate nickname for Valentine’s Day.  Perhaps it’s the reference to D-Day.  V-Day also feels like an invasion, with many commercials and stores reminding us that we “should” be in love.  I dread Valentine’s Day, perhaps like many other single adults.  It is a day that reminds me, in a very loud voice, that I am alone.  I must admit, I have listened to that voice and been down many February 14ths in my life. 

I have read many books and articles, and they all seem to say the same thing: you shouldn’t feel alone.  I want to scream, “Don’t tell me how to feel!”  I know God loves me and is always with me, and I am eternally grateful for my love relationship with my Savior.  But human companionship is important.  God designed us to need each other as representations of His love for us.   

It’s okay to feel alone and to wish you were in a loving partnership.  Feeling this way does not mean you are spiritually weak, and you don’t need to just “get over it.”  You can be single and not love it.  I make the best of it and enjoy many aspects and privileges, but I do want to get married and enjoy sharing my life with someone.  God designed me this way and planted this desire in my heart, and I know that it is only a matter of time before it happens.  I want to invest in someone else and share the journey.  I understand marriage is imperfect and challenging, but it is something that I want and that I believe God for.

Until then, what can you do to stop dreading Valentine’s Day?  Here are some things that have worked for me. 

  • Put the television commercials you are bombarded with in perspective. When you see commercials romanticizing about having a mate in an effort to sell a product, see through it or think about how other people may see it.  I wonder things like, “Do men hate all the diamond commercials?  What if they can’t afford diamonds?  Do women who only get a card think that their man doesn’t really love them?  Do men feel like Valentine's Day is only for the ladies?” 
  • Distract yourself.  Plan something else on that day or around that day that you can look forward to.  This year, a close friend is coming to see me the week before.  I’m so excited to see her, I haven’t thought much about Valentine’s Day. 
  • Do things that make you laugh. What makes you smile?  Laughing and smiling will improve your mood.
  • Give to other loved ones or friends in your life, or give to people like coworkers or those in need. 
  • Buy yourself some flowers.  Why should you enjoy flowers only on Valentine’s Day? Flowers are a gift from God and shouldn’t be limited to romance. 

I’ve decided that I’m doing just fine.  I’m not pathetic or spiritually inadequate; I’m just patiently waiting.  As the Lord once reminded me; patience is not how long you wait, but the attitude in which you do it. 

V-Day seems like an appropriate nickname for Valentine’s Day.  Perhaps it’s the reference to D-Day.  V-Day also feels like an invasion, with many commercials and stores reminding us that we “should” be in love.  I dread Valentine’s Day, perhaps like many other single adults.  It is a day that reminds me, in a very loud voice, that I am alone.  I must admit, I have listened to that voice and been down many February 14ths in my life. 

I have read many books and articles, and they all seem to say the same thing: you shouldn’t feel alone.  I want to scream, “Don’t tell me how to feel!”  I know God loves me and is always with me, and I am eternally grateful for my love relationship with my Savior.  But human companionship is important.  God designed us to need each other as representations of His love for us.   

It’s okay to feel alone and to wish you were in a loving partnership.  Feeling this way does not mean you are spiritually weak, and you don’t need to just “get over it.”  You can be single and not love it.  I make the best of it and enjoy many aspects and privileges, but I do want to get married and enjoy sharing my life with someone.  God designed me this way and planted this desire in my heart, and I know that it is only a matter of time before it happens.  I want to invest in someone else and share the journey.  I understand marriage is imperfect and challenging, but it is something that I want and that I believe God for.

Until then, what can you do to stop dreading Valentine’s Day?  Here are some things that have worked for me. 

  • Put the television commercials you are bombarded with in perspective. When you see commercials romanticizing about having a mate in an effort to sell a product, see through it or think about how other people may see it.  I wonder things like, “Do men hate all the diamond commercials?  What if they can’t afford diamonds?  Do women who only get a card think that their man doesn’t really love them?  Do men feel like Valentine's Day is only for the ladies?” 
  • Distract yourself.  Plan something else on that day or around that day that you can look forward to.  This year, a close friend is coming to see me the week before.  I’m so excited to see her, I haven’t thought much about Valentine’s Day. 
  • Do things that make you laugh. What makes you smile?  Laughing and smiling will improve your mood.
  • Give to other loved ones or friends in your life, or give to people like coworkers or those in need. 
  • Buy yourself some flowers.  Why should you enjoy flowers only on Valentine’s Day? Flowers are a gift from God and shouldn’t be limited to romance. 

I’ve decided that I’m doing just fine.  I’m not pathetic or spiritually inadequate; I’m just patiently waiting.  As the Lord once reminded me; patience is not how long you wait, but the attitude in which you do it. 


Unknown Author

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